Hospital trips and back to the GP.

I really want things to be going well, but they are not!  At the weekend I became overwhelmed and just completely exhausted by everything.  Going to the toilet remains very painful and also very difficult.  I am having real trouble emptying my pouch.  I have been feeling exhausted and generally unwell, I have been nauseous and vomited which I suspect was from the pain.  I have suspected a fissure for a while and yesterday I managed to see a colorectal surgeon who confirmed this.  He also checked to see if the last dilation had worked, which it has.  So I suppose that is good but also means that I still have problems, he mentioned pouch dysfunction but I have to speak to my team about that!  Unfortunately my team, consultant and registrar and SHO are all on leave!! which leaves no one to really help me for a week! hmm I really cried when they said that, I pleaded that they must help me and that the pain was unbearable.  As I am allergic to some painkillers and they don't want me to take codiene I was only left with paracetamol.  The doctor was not allowed to prescribe me other pain killers because of hospital policy.  So my option was to stay in hospital for a week while I wait for the team to come back, how depressing is that.  Fortunately the nurse told me the GP would be able to prescribe me a patch or oramorph.   
We got back from the hospital and I was so lucky to get an appointment with the GP.  I explained the situation to her and she was very understanding and worked out a strategy to get on top of my pain management.  This actually bought me to tears as well, because I was relieved to be getting pain relief.  She also wants to see me in two days to make sure I'm ok and to make sure I will be able to cope over the weekend.  I am very lucky to have some lovely people who are concerned and want to help me.  


So I am feeling a lot better about the situation, it feels more manageable anyway.  I have a cream to treat the fissure and pain medication to get me through it.  Last night I only needed the toilet once, which was fantastic as I had been going every three hours day and night.  After feeling very depressed and overwhelmed by this situation today I feel a lot stronger.  I keep reminding myself that God wouldn't give me anything I couldn't handle.